Interrogative
Note: Out of curiosity, what do people think of the POV, no quotation? If you read, and notice, I'd like to know.
I should have know it was Daffy Duck all along. Why?
…Well, that’s the question. You see, he told me to.
To what, you ask, irritated. This is going to be a long night. But we knew it would be when it all happened. It shouldn’t bother you much; it shouldn’t, you know.
Back to Daffy Duck. What? It’s what I started with.
Yes, I should have known. But it is the problem with being told; being told to know is difficult. Know what? I’ve just told you. You see?
All right then! Leave it - no, I’m not being clever. No, that’s not humility either, thank you. Lost your head last long dark night of the soul?
Ow. …Bloody hell, how am supposed to talk with you hitting me every other sentence? It was not six, it was a good every-other… Right then. Well, you look like you want to. And you did spit on me last time you swore. Is this the usual way of it? He didn’t say, you know. He told me to, not what.
What? Well yes, that’s the problem. What?
What, you say. This time you might mean it. Well, I don’t know; honestly, I don’t. You might know it too, that is, know that I don’t know what.
But you want to know.
Does it matter that I don’t?
Again, you ask, again. From the beginning, yes?
I should have known it was Daffy Duck. All along. From the start.
Why?
You see, he told me to -
That hurt, you know. I can’t help knowing what someone told me, if I don’t know what he meant.
A cartoon duck is irrelevant, you say - you know that don’t you? Well, I’d thought so too. I shrug.
I’m not mad.
You shift, putting a foot up. At least it puts your hand out of range of my face.
I think you’re stupid, you snap.
Yes, well, I’ve thought so too. Not about this in particular. I expected it - a clever anticipation that might have been a bit more brilliant had I side-stepped. But I don’t think you’re impressed.
You prove it with a look.
Once more? you ask.
You mean the duck.
I mean, you say grimly, the truth.
Easy for you to say. Haven’t I just been over giving it to you? No, apparently. Or you haven’t heard it. I did say it loud enough.
Your foot hits the ground with a thud.
I should have known -
The truth.
I’m telling you, that’s all there is. He told me to.
To what?
To know - I should have. But I’ve said, you know - it’s hard to know something only because someone tells you to.
Should have known it was Daffy Duck all along. …Why? Well, yes - that’s the question -
That hurts like Hell. Bloody well isn’t a good incentive - conversation isn’t usually inspired by pain.
Conversation? you ask innocently.
Oh well. I did try. Yes, I say. I’m not mad, you know.
Unfortunately, you don’t think so either.
We both knew it would be a long night when it happened. It shouldn’t bother you much - you know it, too. It bothers me.
I should have known…
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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This reminded me (in a rather scary way) of the kind of conversation I might have with my father. It also reminds me of the Abbet & Castello "Who's on first base" routine. Even if it has reminiscences, though, it's quite original, very funny, and as I said, fun to read. Even though it's prose, it's relaxed, and the way your speaker anticipates the thoughts of the reader (at some points exactly on par with me, strangely enough) is great.
Nicely done!
hehheh... reminds me of the crazy monologue.
, a bit Schizo for the best.
I like the POV how it is
My favorite line would be -
Don't really have anything else to say.
Ciao CL